05 March, 2012

Blogging for Endo Awareness - The Physical

Today marks the beginning of the blog carnival "Blogging for Endometriosis Awareness" & today’s topic is: Week 5 - Physical impact that Endometriosis has had on your life.

I started my period at age 13 and had very little pain in the beginning, then a few years later it began to get worse. My periods were never 28 days, they ranged from 26-36 days. I was advised that "this was part of being a woman" I got no special treatment and didn't expect any. My periods were heavy, a little off track and I would start to cramp days before my period was due. Sometimes the cramps were so bad I could not get up. I would curl up in a ball and cry, Tylenol would not help the pain for long. I thought it was true - that this was just part of "womanhood" that I just had to deal with it, so I really didn't make a huge deal about it, I thought it was fairly normal. I noticed in athletics after a good run I would get a tremendous pain in my side. My doctor told me that I should take birth control.

In high school things got worse. I made several trips to emergency rooms thinking something was truly wrong with me. I never received answers and felt like most doctors thought I only wanted attention or drugs. I was in serious pain each time I went in, and each time I left feeling like a hypochondriac. After accruing lots of medical bills I decided to see my doctor again. They told me that I probably had Endo, but could not confirm without surgery and at the time I did not have money for surgery. They told me that it could affect my ability to conceive so I was put on Birth Control and told not to take the last week "placebo" pills, but to instead start a new pack. I did not have my period for almost a year. It seemed to help, but after a few months I noticed the pain returned. My doctor then said that I could try 6 months of Lupron and I said No, I was not about to put myself through 6 months of induced menopause! At that point I took it upon myself to just deal with my pain and go about my life as best I could, I was not ready to start trying for kids as they mentioned it might be something we think about. So I internally dealt with the fear of how it would affect my fertility, little did I know just how serious it would eventually be.

I have since dealt with years of painful periods, depression, and fatigue. In 2010 I had an emotional breakdown about the reality of my infertility and wanted answers. I knew in my head and my heart that Endo was to blame. At that point I was having extreme periods, lots of fatigue, bleeding in between periods and I often had the heating pad waiting and ready for when my period arrived.

In the last several years I have experienced painful bowl movements, bloating, increased bladder sensitivity, and it is sometimes painful to go poo (sorry tmi). And I'm not talking a little discomfort, I'm talking excruciating pain that feels like your insides are slowly being pulled apart. I take waaaaaaay to much Ibuprofen and Tylenol to deal with pain, but it is better than narcotics. I have had cysts rupture, lower back pain, hip and joint pain, pain during sex, pain during exercise, pain going to the bathroom and I have had pain while not on my period.

I started seeing an RE for my infertility and in April 2011 they found a large cyst on my left ovary. I wound up having surgery in July 2011 and my Doctor found Stage IV Endo. The only way to explain it is - It was everywhere, freaking everywhere and I have already been told that eventually I will lose the left side, just not yet :)

The most recent visit with my RE revealed that everything she did during surgery back in July has grown back :| Huge bummer. We thought it would have waited a bit longer.

Pain, Infertility and Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
All because of this crappy disease = A frustrated Redhead :|

Endo can be a deep struggle and it seems completely unfair at times, but not everyday is a bad day! And I know that I am stronger because of this life I'm living ♥

Physical Impact (March 5):


  1. I feel like I wrote this blog. Our stories are so similiar. Endo sucks big time. I understand your pain, trust me I do. It took away my ability to have kids. BUT, you are going to beat this nasty disease, I just know it. I am rooting for you all the way. Just remember, you are never alone. I'm here for you. :)

  2. I am so glad you are participating in the blog carnival! If you want the links so that the other ladies participating can be displayed at the bottom of your posts, just let me know!
    I am soooo sorry for all of your trials and struggles over the years. Endo is cruel and unrelenting, but know that you are not alone and there is a whole community of us determined to spread awareness and help each other!
    I am glad to "know" you friend! xo

  3. Crystal! So sorry for the off topic comment, but I was afraid if I just replied to my comment you wouldn't see it! Slynn's blog is http://homegrownlove.blogspot.com/ in case you haven't found it yet.

    Still rooting for you, girl!

    1. No Prob :) Thanks so much for sharing the link with me!!!


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